A New Fuhrer (mit ein Umlaut)

Somewhere, possibly in prison, a new Hitler is writing his version of Mein Kampf. While Adolph blamed the Jews, blacks, homosexuals, the mentally challenged and anyone who wasn't "Ayran-looking," for all of his country's troubles, the new potential American Fuhrer will be going after smokers, rich people, oil companies, auto manufacturers, and all other successful business enterprises.

He has been to seventh century Afghanistan and admired their suppression of women and the beheading techniques perfected by Al Qaida. But most of all, he envisions an America with crystal-clear air, uncontaminated by the pollution created by the industrial revolution.

In his cell, he dreams of a nation which is like the Old West, where horses were the only means of transportation and stealing them was a hanging offense. Where people shot those with whom they were angry in the back, and "the skies were not cloudy all day. Home, home on the range."

As we approach this election season, we must take care to reject those who follow the cult of punishment, and watch carefully for the strong man who is lurking in the wings, ready to pounce and take us back in time. Hitler promised his country he would end inflation, provide a sensible "people's car," and make the trains run on time. He did that, and millions of people died. What will the new Hitler do?