Time is relative

My telephone answering machine message lasts twenty seconds. When I am watching TV, it takes me approximately one minute to get to the front door. In the overall scheme of things, those are miniscule periods of time.

Nevertheless, in today's excessively busy world, I rarely have been able to greet any visitor at my door, and, in fact, many of them are already driving away by the time I get there to answer the bell or their knock.. What has happened to patience? It's one minute, for heaven's sake.

Only my son, two daughters and my doctor's office suffer through the interminable twenty-second telephone delay. To be fair, most of the other calls are those electronic messages that my screening is meant to frustrate. Occasionally, however, my message ends, and there still seems to be someone on the line. I am curious why they never speak and always hang up. Just 'cause I don't owe them any money. . . .

"JUST ONE MORE THING:" Lt. Columbo is no longer on the job. Hopefully, Peter Falk (1927-2011) will be buried in a new trenchcoat. I wonder who will get his 1960 Peugeot 403.