Drafts and Shafts

(As submitted to TV)

1. College binge drinkers demonstrate a weakness of character. Universities should be sensitive to the fact that they may graduate persons so impaired that no employers will want to hire them. They can talk ad infinitum about the evils of drinking, but only suspensions and expulsions will show they are serious.

2. The Paradise Unified School District has dumped their junior high sports programs to save a paltry $34,000. What do you bet that there isn't at least one "curriculum expert," "district aesthetician," "audio-visual coordinator," "assistant superintendent," "assistant to the assistant superintendent," or some other extraneous position that pays twice that much? Don't let the bureaucracy short-change the kids.

EXTRA: On a court show, a plaintiff from Alabama referred to "doppers." It turned out they were underwear worn by southern babies.