Back to the drawing board

After $475 million and five months of the Phoenix fictional Mars mission, NASA has told its script writers to take a break. Project manager, Barry Goldstein, is now working on a new scenario, possibly starring Keanu Reeves as the dashing spaceman.

Meanwhile, somewhere in a cellar at Harvard, other "scientists" are still working on an explanation of the escape velocity, and how it can be made to look possible. Some of them secretly hope that Angelina Jolie will join the cast of the new production.

Think of how many people could have been fed, or how much medicine could have been dispensed for $475 million.

FYI: Be advised that some of us move more slowly now, and when you ring our doorbell, it may take us a while to get there. I know it seems like an eternity, but it's only a minute or a minute and a half. Wait. . . I'm coming.